During the film I considered suicide. After the film, I sacrificed an ant to Great Cthulhu to thank him/her/it for my deliverance. Under no circumstances watch this film.

Thus ends the review.

Aside  —  Posted: June 18, 2017 in Art for Art's Sake, Burning Car Press, Cthulhu, Film Review, Uncategorized
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Image  —  Posted: September 28, 2016 in Burning Car Press, New Release, Scenarios, TOPTA, Uncategorized

Potentially a new TOPTA scenario.

Utopia by other means …


Useful tips on playing TOPTA

Posted: August 16, 2016 in Uncategorized


Play the game right boys and girls and this could be you!

meth_620x465What Are the Signs of Psychotic Disorder?

The signs of a psychotic disorder vary. Delusions, paranoia, visual and auditory hallucinations, and a general decline in the sufferer’s ability to make decisions or otherwise get by in the world may all be signs that a person is going through a psychotic illnesses. That and:

  • punching your fist through a fire door
  • dropping tractors on people from great heights
  • eating Greggs
  • making sweet, sweet love to a leopard
  • excusing mass murder by blaming it on the voices, God, strange visions, or your orders from Time Agents Command & Operations (T.A.C.O.)

Sweet Dreams 🙂

Guardian AAR

Posted: July 9, 2016 in Uncategorized

They lived!! After landing in Rigel 223 Ash, our four epic adventures: Captain Jacque LePenn, Chief Science Officer Heather Kriel, Medic Donna Trill and Sanitary Engineer 3rd Class Steve Hicks made their way through the jagged pitons and high velocity winds towards the source of their enquiry, a radar reflecting surface revealed by volcanic activity.

They were rewarded after an hours struggle with a garden of 16 square blocks, each made up of a highly dense silicon compound and beset with an alien figure atop, the creatures were of such an inhuman nature that some members of the team forced to reconsider their career choices.

All the statues were of a similar, apparently intelligent race, except for the last two. One depicted a more violent looking species. The other was empty. It was clear from examination that despite their apparent age, the garden of the ancients had been looked after and maintained.

That’s when they discovered the pyramidic temple, lost contact with the ship. were attacked by a Xenomorph, Heather had a six eyed beer belly attach itself to her face, Jaque LePenn was ripped from his Motokatsu-Kyono Combine Exploration suit, Hicks and Donna stripped off, rescued a cocooned LePenn and shot and kicked to death their acid bleeding opponent.

Time to go back to the MKC Petrograd for a sit down meal and some indigestion tablets.

Now I have to plagiarize a sequel !!